Most of us the first thinking we get when we finish a relationship or cycles we started to think, “Oh my goodness, I’m going to be alone forever.
What is wrong with me?!” I can tell you that years could past by if you don’t change your mindset and attitude to start seen real changes. The desire for loving attachment is one of the most
basic, enduring, and natural human needs but it needs to start with you and your inner you. You need to love yourself and work on yourself before getting out insecure and doing the wrong moves at your dates.
A lot of people out there feel like they will never find love. They have a nagging feeling that maybe they are “doomed” to be alone forever, or maybe they are too “flawed” to be loved—and that, my friends, is a very painful thing to feel.
You need to believe you are a worthy person. I want you to believe
that you deserve to be loved and to find a romantic partner that will
cherish you. Stop thinking the bad moments or words because this generate bad emotions and will affect everything around you. You need Get rid of the fear of being forever single, because it is
just that: a fear, an emotion that you have about yourself, a belief about your future—not reality.
So how to stop Being Single ? How can I feel better with myself ?
Here are 7 ways to keep you motivated and will help you to get out of that bad state of mind:
1. Stop Criticizing Yourself
Take an honest look at how often you put yourself down during an
average day. How often do you criticize yourself by telling yourself
things like: I’m so stupid. I’m too fat. I’m too old. I’m ugly. I’m
damaged goods. I always screw things up. I’m an idiot. And so on and so
forth. Rings a bell? Well if you talk to yourself in this way, your mood
will drop, your fears and insecurities will increase, and you are
basically conditioning yourself to believe you are an unworthy person.
Your thoughts have a direct impact on how you feel.
It’s simple. Think good things: feel good. Think bad things: feel bad.
2. Feel Good About Yourself
This cannot be said enough. Imagine you walked into a car dealership
and the salesman told you he had a car for you. He says, “Well, it’s
kinda old and beat up. It still runs, but it’s high on gas, there’s a
few scratches on the paint, and I’m not sure how reliable it is.” Now,
how much would you want to buy that car? You’d be out of there in a New
York second and looking for something better in no time, I’m quite sure.
Why? Because if the person selling you the car doesn’t even believe in
the quality of the car, why should you?
3. Realize You Have Something Valuable to Offer
What are some of your great qualities? Are you an honest,
hard-working, sensitive person? Are you an athletic, artistic,
family-oriented individual? Are a relaxed, easy-going person, or an
organized, efficient person? Not only can you find someone who shares
the same interests and qualities that you hold, but you can also
complement (not complete with!) your future partner by bringing in your
own strengths to the relationship.
4. Change the Way You Think and Feel About the Opposite Sex
So many individuals hold false beliefs about the opposite sex.
Because you’ve had bad experiences, your way to appraise the opposite
sex has changed.
What are the beliefs you hold about the opposite sex? Do you think things like:
- All men are jerks.
- Men only want sex.
- Men fear relationships.
- Men can’t be faithful.
- All women are gold diggers.
- All women are emotional explosions.
- All the good ones are taken.
Well, that’s simply not true. Men want love and marriage just as
much as women do. There are still plenty of great, fun-loving,
charming, and gentle people out there. If you hold these negative
thoughts about the opposite sex, your fear of staying single forever
multiplies because you are constantly telling yourself that there is no
one for you out there.
5. Change the Way You Think and Feel About Being Single
Have you noticed how being married and having children has become a
measure of personal success and worth? There seems to be tremendous
social pressure to be in a relationship, especially for women. No matter
how successful a woman is, if she’s single, people think she’s either
unhappy or so difficult to get along with that she can’t make a
relationship work. This makes being single look like some sort of
personal failure. You are not a failure. Your personal value is exactly
the same whether you are single or in a relationship.
6. Focus on What You Do Have
Be grateful for friends and family. Your fear of being alone makes
you feel and act desperate (I know—I’ve been there, too). But nobody
wants to fill the position of the interchangeable boyfriend or
girlfriend. People want to know you love them for who they are, and that
you don’t just need someone to take care of you. Be grateful for all
the beautiful things that you do have. Focusing on the one thing that is
missing from your life makes you miss the larger picture: You have tons
of great things going for you already!
7. Schedule Activities Every Week and Enjoy Yourself
Make the most of your time alone and enjoy yourself. Being in a
relationship leaves less time for hanging out with friends, reading
books, scheduling activities that are just for you (no matter how great
your new boyfriend is, I doubt he’ll want to go have bikini wax with
you). See this as a relational-vacation time! Go out there and have some
fun. By filling your life with activities, you won’t focus on the
“emptiness” as much. Instead, you’ll see that you have a rich life, and
you’ll feel happier. Being happier will make you an instant date-magnet!
People want to be around happy people. Confidence is the most